"You're just like an angel
Your skin makes me cry
You float like a feather
In a beautiful world
And I wish I was special
You're so fuckin' special
But I'm a creep "(Radiohead)
Versione italiana al link Voglio un uomo/una donna speciale
Come on, let's face it: nothing is free in life. The most beautiful things, we have often sweated and suffered to get them. Happiness, we must be able to afford it. It can cost commitment and courage, responsibility and jumps in the dark. It can cost mistakes and 'horrors', as I sometimes love to say.
After all, by my very nature, I have always preferred "an end with horror to an endless horror", just to quote Enzensberger, and I mean the horror of a flat life, stagnant, or based on relationships of convenience in which you wear masks even in contradiction to each other.
Sometimes we hope that it is the magical encounter, a special person who 'saves' us, who brings us out of our boredom or suffering, who gives meaning to our lives, filling in the gaps. And here the eternal dilemma arises: many women want a 'special man' and also many men say they are looking for a 'special woman'. Then, who knows why, they choose te ‘habitual’, the 'normal', the 'banal'.
The explanation is that the 'special', at the end of the day, is scary. It is what we cannot control, the unknown, the one who brings out our deepest insecurities, as well as our most dazzling splendours.
All this is true in the fortunate case in which we really come across an out-of-the-ordinary person. But does this person exist? Are there special men and women? Is there an ideal partner?
Not until we become one. Someone has to start doing it!
We are always very good at making our demands on life, the universe or Santa Claus...but how much are we willing to give? How much are we willing to be - special?
Also, why should a special person bother to be with us, especially if after a couple of months of dating we try to 'normalize' or 'tame' them according to our needs and our unhealed emotional wounds? Please! Let's start to change our perspective and turn the paradigm upside down:
Give what you would like to have.
Become who you would like to meet.
Be your 'special' person, that means: know, discover, express your talents, realize the beautiful in your life, the good, the true. If nothing else, you will no longer have time to complain about why life not sending you some special person!